Monday, October 27, 2008

"There's Cheese in my Rhine Wine"

Picture it: Four New York socialites traveling to bumble Virginia for a fellow socialite's birthday. Fish out of water. We were in for one hell of a weekend.

We of course traveled in style: a rented Dodge Avenger from the local Alamo. A hop, skip, and an EZPass later, we crossed the line into Loudon County, Virginia.

Before we arrived at Les Doux, Hamilton, VA (the birthday girl's house) - also a Hills reference for those of you who missed it (but it doesn't mean the birthday girl is like Heidi, because that's just mean) we needed an appropriate accompaniment. A stop at the local Safeway provided much needed comic and alcoholic relief. Upon arriving at the wine section, conveniently located to left of the front door, we came across a sea of white cardboard boxes: Franzia and Almaden appeared as a supermarket oasis. A few minutes of reading the various selections of red, white, and other, we settled on Almanden's Mountain Rhine Wine, 12% alcohol by volume. Fit for a king.

We arrived on scene, only 45 fashionable minutes late. After some slightly awkward introductions, we settled in for some silent college football, and a discussion about debris in my cup. We also Cha-Cha'd to confirm where the name Rhine Wine came from, since Almaden is made in the U.S. of A, and not, contrary to popular belief, Germany. We found out, but I won't bore you. Thrills.

Finally, at some point, someone mentioned the 800 pound gorilla in the room: the computerized Catch Phrase game. I, of course, rocked (it's a cross I bare). After the ice breaker, things really warmed up. We played a Jeopardy drinking game and made fun of the floozy returning champion, Larissa Kelly.

(Side note: this was confirmed by Alex Trebek. On the "interview" portion of the show, Alex mentioned something about her lame mock trial experience in high school, to which Alex inquired: did you get them (the fake criminals) off every time? She said, most of the time. He said: "Well, you're getting some off now." Confirmation! And awk!).

The party continued with the requisite beer pong, flip cup, cupcake eating, fun with bottle opening and body parts (picture soon).

All in all, we had fun, made new friends (people like me, it's another cross I bare), and renewed our love of all things suburban and boxed.

Friday, October 24, 2008

"Yeah, I have a question... how dare you?"

I think it is time that I explain the inception of this blog (about thangs).

While my dear friend Brian and I were studying for the New York (him) and the Virginia (me) bar exams (which I totally passed btw), we would do ANYTHING to avoid studying. One day in my free time I was googling "So You Think You Can Dance," something I do at an embarrassing frequency, not only when I want to avoid studying. Well, that day, the stars and google collided because I stumbled upon a blog (but really it was a vlog) that recapped SYTYCD. And one of the vloggers was Bizzaro Brian. He could be his twin brother.

Don't believe me? See twin vlogging here:

Brian on the left. "Brian's twin" on the right. No, your eyes are not playing tricks on you.... it's TWO people.

So now that we agree that they are twins.... moving on.

Not to be outdone, Actual Brian (not Bizarro Brian) and I decided to start a blog of our own to catalog our lives and the fun things we spot along the way.

Brian's twin (we'll call him "Pat," because that is his name) has a blog called, adorably, So, in a stroke of genius, Brian unveiled our blog, an even more adorable, ablogaboutthangs!

And the blog was born!

The story clearly does not end there. Which leads me to the title of this installment. "Yeah, I have a question... how dare you?"

So Pat lives in NYC, where Brian recently moved. How perfect, right?! 2 twins, 1 city of dreams... doesn't get much better. Since the move I have become obsessed with the two of them meeting and then by extension us all becoming awesome friends.

Well, the first step to any awesome friendship is internet friendship. So, in an attempt at just that, I facebooked Pat "Brian's twin." Before you call me a creepy internet stalker, he was extremely easy to find. It was as if he (and fate) wanted me to find him. So click-click-beep-beep, Pat had a friend request from me. I assumed within the hour we would be well on our way to actual friendship, or at the very least I would have a list of his favorite movies and be able to see what he did this weekend in the city because what if we were in the same neighborhood and didn't even know it?
Well, Brian's twin had other plans for us. Brace yourself blogging world (or, Matt, the one person who reads this blog). He DENIED my friendship. Such a burn.

I hardly know who I am anymore... or the purpose of this blog. It's the worst. To be denied internet friendship is such an insult. Because all it takes to be internet friends it clicking accept and then the duties of friendship officially end. And the perks are unlimited stalking. It's win-win. Well apparently my FB internet personality was just not enough. (Which is absurd... seriously, go check it out.)

Good thing this isn't my first time at the rodeo. A few minutes after I got over the shock of the friendship denial I moved on. If I can't have a new internet friendship, I'll do the next best thing, create a fake internet personality in his network and just stalk away.

I guess all's well that ends well... as long as Brian's twin never sees this post and gets a (reasonable but nonetheless hurtful) restraining order. How dare you?